Hey Dummies!!
That’s you. It’s what we’re calling our readers. Like how Katy Perry has Katy Kats and Beyoncé has the Bey Hive and Mariah Carey has...lambs for some reason? Anyway, it’s a compliment.
Have you ever been casually surfing the net for beauty tips and been like, “you know, I wish there were more cool people talking about this in a real way instead of a million 50-step contouring tutorials that nobody’s ever actually gonna do?” So have we. That’s why we started this blog.
Thanks for joining us! We’re gonna have so much fun.
Ok, first things first. We’re Hannah and Kathryn! And since we wanna be your new best friends, we asked each other a lightning round of interview questions to help you get to know us better. Think of it like speed dating but for friendship. Plus, it’s on the internet so you don’t have to sit across from us IRL making small talk. You can just read it! Technology has made the world so wonderful.
Hannah!
My aesthetic is…
Grunge Zelda
Last song you were listening to?
H: “Lovers in the Parking Lot” by Solange
Describe yourself in 3 fictional characters.
H: Rini from Sailor Moon, Daria, Marceline from Adventure Time
If you could be bff with one celeb...
H: Hm...Keanu Reeves is pretty cool...
10 years ago I was...
H: 16 and real angsty and moody. I worked at the movie theater and went to a lot of metal shows.
I wish everybody understood...
H: that flatironing your hair is not good for it. Ever. In any context.
When I'm not writing about beauty I'm…
H: talking about it to my clients, doing hair, cleaning something or reading
Favorite thing to do on a Sunday?
H: Sleep in
I spend all my money on…
H: Lunch
Favorite movie genre?
H: Sci-fi. But only the good ones. There are a lot of shitty ones. Like I’m not gonna be watching fucking Sharknado, just FYI.
Appetizers or desserts?
H: Desserts. No one ever orders desserts with me. It sucks!
Favorite throwback beauty trend?
H: Butterfly clips
Would you rather go deep sea exploring or go to space:
H: In the deep sea I could potentially see a giant squid so, fuck yeah. I’m all about that.
Marry, bury, smash: Ron Swanson, The Hamburgler, Joanne The Scammer?
H: I think I’d probably bury Hamburgler bc he would steal my hamburgers and that’s not ok, smash Ron Swanson because he’s a lumberjack, and marry Joanne the Scammer because she’d scam us a great house to live in.
Guilty pleasure?
H: $30 massages in Chinatown
Everyday products:
H: I use a lot so I’ll just list a few
Caudalie Micellar Cleansing Water. Great makeup remover and skin refresher.
Belif Cleansing Stick. You rub it on your face and it makes washing your face fun. It’s also really gentle on sensitive skin.
Etude House BB Cream. It comes in two formulations, dewy and matte. I probably should have gotten the matte because the dewy one makes me look sweaty sometimes.
Kat Von D concealer. I’m trying it out, but NARS is still my favorite.
I always wear mascara but I’m always looking for one I like because my eyelashes are really fine and straight. My fallback is Almay Get Up And Grow
Sephora brand Matte Cream Lip Stains for a bold lip
Kathryn!
My aesthetic is…
K: Teenage boy by day, video girl by night
Last song you were listening to?
K: Cash Me Ousside remix by DJ Suede The Remix God. It’s good don't judge me.
Describe yourself in 3 fictional characters:
K: Cher from Clueless, Jane from Daria, and Garfield
If you could be bff with one celeb...
K: Rihanna. I thought about saying Beyoncé but I honestly think I’d be dead weight and drag her down.
10 years ago I was…
K: A senior in high school skipping a lot of class and getting speeding tickets
I wish everybody understood…
K: How their privilege affects their worldview
When I'm not writing about beauty I'm…
K: Writing and performing comedy, telling stories, drinking vodka, binge watching 30 Rock for the 200th time
Favorite thing to do on a Sunday?
K: Eat something fried at brunch
I spend all my money on…
K: Kitty litter
Favorite movie genre?
K: Tied between horror and teen comedy
Appetizers or desserts?
K: Apps all day! A jalapeño popper sounds so good right now.
Favorite throwback beauty trend?
K: Braces
Would you rather go sky diving or cave diving?
K: I guess if I had to choose I’d pick skydiving. I hate heights, but at least there are fewer things that can go wrong. The parachute either opens...or it doesn’t, you know? Ok now I have anxiety.
Marry, bury, smash: Jordan Peele, Guy Fieri, Wario
K: Marry Jordan Peele, obviously. I'm a Guy Fieri fan tbh, but the idea of having sex with him makes me want to throw up. I think I would smash Wario because at the very least I’ve never seen how disgusting he looks when he eats. So I’d have to bury Guy Fieri. Sorry dude. RIP.
Guilty pleasure?
K: Kylie Jenner’s Instagram
Everyday products:
Jergen’s Natural Glow Wet Skin Moisturizer because I’m trashy and I like to bronze, sue me.
Earthly Body Leave-In Conditioner. Believe it or not I’m not a natural blonde so I need to work hard to keep my hair soft.
Make Up Forever HD Foundation I don’t wear this every day, but definitely when I’m on stage or on camera. It’s the best and looks the most natural of any foundation I’ve ever used.
NARS Radiant Creamy Concealer Would have to wear sunglasses everywhere if it weren’t for this. This product is worth the splurge for me, and hardly anything ever is.
Anastasia Beverly Hills Brow Wiz I’ve been growing my eyebrows in for years and they’re still not quite where I want them. This pencil makes them seem perfect.
Nyx Soft Matte Lip Cream Smells tasty, looks sexy AF.
Maybelline Great Lash Mascara. Don’t overthink it. This shit is classic.
